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"Some guys can be perceived as emotionally unavailable when, really, they're just looking for different things." Then there are the guys who actively take advantage of your emotions and seek out turbulence in a relationship.

But unless a guy is kicking puppies or otherwise exerting overtly asshole-ish behavior when you first lay eyes on him, you can't instantly tell he's an asshole.

He's emotionally unavailable right now, but if I just wait it out until he gets over his ex or breaks up with his girlfriend, he'll finally become available! We attribute his unwillingness to commit to outside circumstances (rather than to his own choice, which is what it is — if he wanted to be with you, he would) and waste so much time waiting around for a man's emotional availability to change.

"I still have guys in my life who I feel will 'pull out of it' and realize I'm the best thing ever and come running," Michelle admits.

They mentioned it in soft, apologetic emails using figurative language.

We do look forward to continuing the conversation with greater sensitivity.

Now that I'm in a healthy relationship, I look back at all my past relationships and realize what B. She's single because she hasn't met the right guy yet.

And yet most women who are actively dating have had the accusation lobbed their way.

This is all too common, says Davila: "People spend a lot of time hoping other people are going to change," she says.

"When you keep making excuses for why something's not working, it's disastrous." A danger with this term is that it's inherently a temporary thing.

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